My friend has a serious problem with his parents.

[gike]

First of all, i'm not gay.

Now,
My Friend has a real problem with this mother,
He does everything for her, cleaning the table, doing the dish and etc...
He recent got a gf, his mom hates her and she even took his phone and text messaged to his gf that it's over. He is really on the cliff of a mental and physical break down.
He is 17, He may not go out, stay 1 hour away, he may not even see his gf or go outside school in the midday.
His brother (that is younger then him) can do everything. His brother has his own PC, is allowed to go out and stay away really long.
I already support him but there is nothing I can change. I am only preventing him for a breakdown and he is also thinking of suicide .
His mother also ordered to spy his brother. Now he can't even have his own phone.
Can someone give me some advice to support him?

Thank You Kindly,
Gike.

[sOaPeY]

You only mention his mother. Does his father have a presence in his life? If so, tell him to try talking with his dad(and also his mother) about it. There has to be more behind the story than this, but honestly talking will do more than anything. If talking doesn't work, the best bet for him might be the guidance counselors at school. 90% of them know more than what you would think. With the right words, parents are usually called into the school and the counselors are mediators in family discussions.

Just remind him to be respectful.
p.s. I cleaned up your post to make it more readable.

[fl00d3d]

I agree with reb: [1] be respectful in all dealings, and [2] there is more to the story.

It sounds like the mother is manipulative and controlling. It's one thing to forbid your kid to spend time with another person - and its another to take their phone and pretend to be him and say "its over".

Does he have a job? If so, I'd tell him to use his own money to buy a pre-paid phone that is in HIS name and is HIS property. That way his mom can't take it, and if she does its theft. The tricky part is, if its in her house she could argue that its hers since he's a minor.

At 17 he needs to stand up for himself. There is something called "fight or flight" and he's clearly choosing the "flight" path (giving up) rather than the "fight" path. I would advise against this under the circumstances (age and level of control by mother) - unless there is something else that hasn't been mentioned (ie. he was caught with drugs or bad influence friends/etc).

[gike]

Thanks all for the fast reply and cleaning up my post.

His parents are divorced and his step-dad is actually clinish dead (or something). His step-dad plays WoW 24/7 and doesn't do anything. His real biological dad feels sorry for his son. His dad allows him to go see his gf but the problem is, his younger brother. He can't go away or his brother reports it to his mom.
The real-life situation is even worse. He is one of the most respectful friends I have ever known.
He does everything for his mom and his mom treats him like ****.

If you guys want, I will try to get him on this forum, then he can do the full story.

Greetings,
Gike.

[sOaPeY]

I'd stick to my original ideas, even with the new info. Mom has to want something from her son(in return for his "freedom"). He just needs to figure out how he can get what he wants while gaining what he wants.

[Commie]

This will seem offensive, but I mean no harm: Has your friend tried to stick up for himself?

How close is he with his girlfriend? I've had episodes where I've just had enough of my parents and just lived with my girlfriend for a few days, even months. But, I guess that comes with how much he gets along with his girlfriend's parents.

Even then, it doesn't have to be a girlfriends, heck, it could even be your house. Just find someone with parents he can trust, and go there.

[Guest]

Step 1
The moms gonna be very mature!...she is seeing things in her that he can not see!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she is protecting him from her for some reason. Just the same way I tell my boy " your not hanging around that kid" "22mag"..he just don't get why I say such a thing.. of course he wouldn't!
He has to convince the mother he has respect for the moms dislike of his girl friend and assure her that he is in the learning stages of the the relationship right now and wont make irrational decisions.

Step 2
Pack his bags..tell mom to fok her self..get apartment with girl..he will end up knocking
her up for sure ! and fok his own life up!

I know!...i did step 2!!!