trouble lately... dont know wat to do

[guest...]

hey i'd really love it if you guys didnt play the guessing game bc i really want this to be anonymous... me and my girlfriend have been having troubles lately because she wants a tattoo and im totally against it and she has wanted one her whole life and i said that i would be really pissed if she got a tattoo and so now she said that shes not gonna get one but she fuckin begged me and i still said no and now i feel like sh*t and i've felt like sh*t for a couple weeks now and i feel like im about to break and i really really love this girl but i dont know what to do and i'll never break up with her even if she cheated on me i couldnt break up with her because i just love her so much it kills me to think about it but i dont know what to do anymore if things keep going like this eventually im gonna snap and im gonna yell at her and then shes gonna break up with me and then im just gonna have to fuckin kill myself please i need help and if your gonna talk negative to me then stay the f*ck out because i dont need you making me feel worse about this.

[Guest]

I kinda understand what you're talking about because I'm not a huge fan of them either, and it tends to be an addicting habit ... so they won't just stop with one. If you guys are older (lets say above 17/18 yrs old) and have been together for awhile (about a year or more) then I'd say you should have a strong say. Don't be forceful about it, but make it known WHY you don't like them. If you aren't that old or you haven't been together that long, then I wouldn't worry about it one way or another because relationships don't tend to be too serious yet --- so its not worth arguing over tattoo yet.

You'd have to tell us more about the situation, but generally speaking I think its fair that you express your opinion ... and I also agree that females shouldn't be loading their bodies with tattoos especially if they have a body worth appreciating (natural beauty). But if they insist, I'd be most inclined to ask them WHY they insist. Remind her that once its on .... its on. And it isn't coming off. Even tattoo removals leave scars behind. It also depends on what they get. A cute little butterfly on the back of her heel is nothing. A dragon that takes up her entire back ... yeah, nasty. So there are a lot of different variables here.

Thats my opinion, and my suggestion.

[guest...]

well i've known her for 3 years now been with her for 2 and shes turning 18 on monday and we're both very very serious about our relationship and i want her body to be perfect like it is now i dont want a tattoo on her. my main problem is that i get too jealous and that she asks for my opinion and watever i say becomes law and she makes me feel like im controlling her but im really not i want her to be herself i dont want her to get a tattoo solely for preserving her like i've already compromised on a nose piercing now wtf y do i gotta give more and she wants a small tattoo not really big, but its not really the tattoo thats not the big picture, the big picture is that i expect a lot from her because i love her so much and i've been with her for what seems like my whole life and like i love her so much shes so sweet n loving n we talk about marrying and kids a lot like people say that im whipped but i know that im whipped and idc if i am i love her n i'll do anything for her short of spending my life savings on her

[Guest]

lol this sounds like my girlfriend, entirely

She wanted her nose pierced, too, and I wasn't for it. But then I was like "whatever" and she jumped all over it and did it right away. I can't say I mind that anymore - but then it moved on to the tattoo fetish. She's got a couple (after saying she only wanted one) and one of them she's complained about a couple of times ("I wish I hadn't got it"). Oh well, now she's stuck with it. It doesn't look bad, but the whole point is - this sh*t isn't reversible. So you really need to get over your "identity crisis" phase and be a little more wise with your body. HOWEVER, if its subtle and appropriate and won't screw her out of employment in the future (etc) then I'd say just make sure its done in a safe tattoo parlor.

But, yeah, don't overpower her in her decisions. Make it a democratic thing - and prove that you don't need a "parent and child" relationship in order to succeed. If you guys are more like friends, the relationship will last MUCH longer anyway. And you'll tolerate eachother during the badtimes

[Guest2]

Honestly, you're being a bit selfish.
You want her to be what YOU want her to be. Why not allow her to self-express?
Suggest to her that tattoos are for life, permanent, and that she really ought to think about what she's doing before she does it.

I got one tattoo because it meant something...but also because I just wanted a damn tattoo. Thank GOD I love the thing. I got another tattoo in a time of depression...while I often rethink this particular one, I love it too...and I intend to keep it.

Regardless, let her make her own choices...Tell her you support whatever decision she makes but you love her body the way it is, untouched. That inking it may lose that innocence.

But certainly don't fuss over it. If she can't learn to compromise or atleast talk to you without being so independent, then you must ask yourself if this is the type of girl you want to spend your time on?

[SpAzErMaN]

Keep in mind... Tattoo's Get all Saggy once your older!

[Brian]

I don't see what the issue is with you not wanting her to get this tattoo. Honestly, it's her body, if she wants a tattoo, then it's ultimately her choice. How would you feel if you wanted something as badly as she does, and you were told "absolutely not"? Do you want to be her Dad or her boyfriend? I think it's a bit immature to be so hellbent on a decision that is not yours to make. Don't take this as a personal attack, I'm not sayint you ARE immature, I'm just saying the situation is a bit immature.

[raulperez]

i thought only guests were supposed to be able to post here?

[Grimes [3rd ID]]

Yes... but i think you should have a choice :/

[guest...]

brian, y dont u stfu and gtfo i said i dont want to hear that sh*t its pretty personal to me n im pretty offended that you want to pass judgement on me wen u dont know who i am, f*ck off

[guest...]

wow, i come in here looking for personal advice and i get this bullshit, i thought that this was the tsu couch not the tsu flaming arena. pls close this topic wat a bunch of bullshit.

[Grimes [3rd ID]]

brian, y dont u stfu and gtfo i said i dont want to hear that sh*t its pretty personal to me n im pretty offended that you want to pass judgement on me wen u dont know who i am, f*ck off

Brian is correct, and dont come posting if you dont wanna hear somthing

[Brian]

I consider myself a pretty mature person, and am in no way trying to flame you. You came here anonymously, and asked advice, I gave the exact same advice I'd give you, my little brother, or my best friend. I have no reason to try to bust your balls over this, and I think I did my best to be as non-confrontational about it. I don't make it a point to mislead people when it comes to something they feel is important, whether I believe it's important or not. I suggest you don't take it personally, and take a step back and re-evaluate where this problem lies.

[guest...]

if you check my ip i will boycott the forums, this is supposed to be anonymous after all.

idc wat u guys think, stay the f*ck out if ur gonna criticize me bc im very vulnerable rite now n its hard enough covering it up in real life and on here. u guys dont need to be cheerleaders, just stay the f*ck out. way 2 go off topic in a help thread yah u guys really do care after all. if all those posts dont get deleted then tsugaming is a joke for going against its own rules

[Grimes [3rd ID]]

Dude, take a chill pill... all we did is give you advice. If you didnt like it, oh well it happens. Not worth cryin at us over it :/